That’s the image I saw flashing on CNN after Obama declared Joe Biden as his running mate. No wonder Biden is one of the most suitable candidate democrats can have at the moment, however what surprised me was something else.

Before American media bring this out, let me be the first person on the planet to point out the resemblance of names “OBAMA BIDEN” and “OSAMA BIN LADEN”. What an amazing co-incidence! One name refers to the people who might be ruling the America in future and the other is the most hated person by Americans.

It’s just the difference of 4 characters…If this was India; there would have been numerologists all over TV-channels making money over those 4 uncommon characters. Thank God I haven’t found numerologists in US, but who knows… What do Americans have to say about this?

There arrives a time in life where one is supposed to take bold and daring decisions. Decisions that are tough, challenging and that would march us towards a destination. Having wasted last one and half years in pursuit of searching happiness, the only thing I have realized is that "there is no such thing called as happiness or sadness". It's all the perception of mind. There have been times when I have enjoyed the sadness, laughed like a sadist when things were gone bad bad, cried like stupid when things were going great and vice versa. From last one and half years, I haven't produced a single scientific paper, every time I get a new idea, I have no focus and concentration to put it in the form of paper.

It's difficult to keep the persistent concentration on various fields of science. Somewhere, one starts ignoring other fields. I think that's exactly what happened with me. Or may be, I was taking too much of pressure. From quantum mechanics to VLSI, from embedded systems to group theory, I was trying everything and that's where I lost the focus. For me Science is passion, love and destination. It's not for a particular materialistic reason that I do research. Even though that often makes me feel proud but sometimes when people with corrupt commercial minds doubts my credibility, it hurts. I don't perceive and stress on innovation to make money out of it, I simply don't has those instincts of commercialization.

Right now, I am going through to big problems. One, that I am no longer the sharp and ever active Abubakr that I once was, two, I don't have that determination, zeal and concentration to make breakthroughs. It's hard to accept this and probably I might never accept it. But somewhere, for what I have been doing from last one year reflects that it's true. My heart will always refuse to accept this. When someone raises a question on credibility of my research, I often feel let me crack this and that and show my research power to the world. However, it's not as simple. Great researchers don't do research to show it to the world, they do it for the passion of it. The passion for research that I had during engineering is just no longer there in me.

There is never a wrong time to do the right thing and crucial time has arrived to do the right things. I will start it from ground level again and let's see where I end up reaching this time.